Got it All Wrong
by iloveatem
Summary: Despite his wealth, power, and influence, the world does not belong to Seto Kaiba. He could not merely fire those he wanted to be rid of. He could not just fire Jounouchi Katsuya. But he would try. KaiJou. Another oneshot based on Kaiba's insane logic.


by: _iloveatem_

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**Patrick:** I gotta get going. He told me to.  
**SpongeBob:** Who did?  
**Patrick:** Uhh... well... uhh... hmmm... I'm not sure. But he had a briefcase.  
**SpongeBob:** A BREIFCASE!?! He might be a paid assassin! 

**-:- -:- -:- -:- -:-**

"You're fired."

The man took a fleeting step backwards. "Wh-what?"

A piercing blue gaze shot through his nervously darting pupils. "Did I stutter?"

"B-b-but Kaiba-sama, please, you can't fire me over this, I-I-"

"I can't? Really? Is there a new rule written in the Kaiba Corp code of conduct that disallows me to fire incompetent subordinates?" Venom laced his words beautifully, as if this tone was well-practiced. And it was.

"Well, no-"

"I would think not," the tall, thin man interrupted again. "Considering I wrote it. You're wasting my time. Get out now, if you ever want any hope of working in Japan again." Kaiba watched the man hightail it out of the large office with an almost bored and definitely indifferent air. When the wooden door -inconspicuously labeled "Kaiba Seto, CEO"- finally closed with a soft "clack", a small yet rather wicked grin tugged at Kaiba's lips.

He did so enjoy firing people, and for that reason he was almost certain he must be pure -if not, partially- evil. Or at least extremely sadistic. But he was a man of great power who, conveniently, thrived in it. Nothing could compare to grown men, twice or sometimes triple his age, cowering before him, fully aware that the teenager in front of them held their lives in his palm. He could make their existences a living Hell. He could ruin the reputation, and thereby the future, of anyone he so chose. He was a threat to be reckoned with. Strike that, he was a _god_, capable of the destruction of worlds if he wished it. He was _it_.

And he knew it.

He would not, would never, tolerate incompetence. Stupidity was something he would have liked to wipe off the face of the Earth. It irked him more than he could say, the fact that, despite his very picky and analytical methods, stupidity still somehow wormed it way into his corporation. _His_. Here, he was law. His world would be perfect. Stupidity was not allowed.

Which is why firing people felt so good. With every foolish individual he thrust out of his perfect world, a new, better, more intelligent person would take its place. Things would be more efficient. There would be less mistakes. Things would _run_ like they were supposed to. It was _progress_, just as much as it was business.

And it was something he was damn good at.

His business world, where he was comfortable, where he knew precisely what he was doing, would be nothing less than the absolute best. He could do that. He _was_ doing that. He was the best at what he did. He ran his company with an iron fist so deadly, he was feared far and wide in the business world. He got what he wanted, when he wanted it. And he knew what he wanted.

Absolute control.

It coursed through his veins and was the closest thing to giddy excitement that he had ever experienced. It gave him a high like no other. Power was his drug. This was where he belonged. At the top.

However…

Not all things can be handled in this way. The business world, Kaiba Seto's utopia, is much different than the real world. But that never stopped him from trying to combine the two.

Despite his wealth, despite his power and influence, the world does not belong to Seto Kaiba. He could not merely fire the stupid. He could not just fire Jounouchi Katsuya.

But he tried.

The boy was hotheaded, stubborn, moronic; a positively clumsy and useless human being. What possibly assets could he contribute to the world? None, Kaiba was convinced. And, therefore, he was merely in the way, dragging down the people around him who might actually be able to make something of themselves one day. He couldn't stand it.

To Seto Kaiba, Jounouchi Katsuya was a liability. He had to be fired.

But this put Kaiba into a difficult situation. How would he go about firing Jounouchi? He did not work for him, so therefore, Kaiba had no real authority over the impulsive teenager. But lack of authority would never stop Kaiba from attaining his goals. He went from living in an orphanage to ruling a multibillion dollar corporation. Surely getting rid of one, lousy Bonkotsu couldn't be that hard.

But the more Kaiba analyzed his situation, the more lost he became. He had tried many things. He insulted the make inu, threw him in the dirt where he rightfully belonged, beat him in mind and body countless times again and again. Nothing seemed to work.

It came to a point where Seto Kaiba became infatuated with his new goal (though not so new anymore). He couldn't murder him, although that hadn't stopped him from trying, along with the rest of his pathetic little friends (why not kill four birds with one stone?). But the dog had wormed his way out of it, as he did every single time!

Why was this person so hard to dispose of? Kaiba would think to himself. Never had he encountered such a difficult task. When he wanted people gone, they were gone. Look at his adopted father, for God's sake! What was so special about Jounouchi?

Perhaps if he figured that out, he'd be able to exploit it and, therefore, be rid of the boy. He did not quake in fear before Kaiba like all the others, and yet he never extended a hand in friendship. What made him so immune to the methods Kaiba himself had honed to perfection over the years?

One thing was for sure: if he wanted to discover the make inu's secret, he'd have to go about it in a different way than he had been doing. Because, obviously, this was not working -something Kaiba would only indirect admit to himself. He needed a new game plan.

And then it came to him. It was simple, really. Why he had never considered it before was a mystery.

He'd need to exploit Jounouchi's weakness in order to discover his secret and, in turn, exploit that.

And Kaiba had known his weakness all along. It was love. The gears were already whirring in Kaiba's mind.

He would fire Jounouchi. It wasn't a question of if. It was a question of _when_.

--

--

--

_Kaiba's POV_

You look at me and you don't understand what I'm getting at. You're an idiot. That's why you must be disposed of. It is because of this idiocy that you yourself can't even see that blinding truth. And it _is_ blinding. It's been blinding me for far too long. I should not have taken so much time just for the likes of you. But I convince myself that it'll be worth it in the end. I'll be rid of you.

I will break you.

And it will be satisfying, seeing the pieces of you fall apart by my own hand. Oh, so satisfying.

I must see you shatter. Else, it will not work.

All of it would have been for nothing.

--

--

"I'm not one of your employees, Kaiba. You can't control me! You're a fool, Seto Kaiba!"

No, that's impossible. How could he have figured it out? It must be a bluff. But, if so, does he realize how close he came to my true motives? He couldn't possibly. He's an idiot!

And yet he continues to stare defiantly at me, a stare that I myself am capable of, but never use. I never have to be defiant. The world bows down to me without such a look.

The world.

But not you.

It isn't love is it? Your weakness. I realize that now. But it's already too late. My plan is in motion. I would rather die than step down now.

--

--

--

_Normal POV_

He points an accusing finger at Kaiba.

"You're the same as me, you idiot! We're both human beings, just trying to live our lives as best we can! So you have more money than me, so you're smarter than I am. Who cares?! In the end, none of that matters! What matters is how you feel about the people around you!"

"Oh please, don't feed me that shit." Kaiba's eyes are dead, emotionless.

He places his hand on the tall CEO's cheek.

"Kaiba…you can't solve every problem by getting rid of it. Sometimes you need to venture away from what is comfortable to you and test new waters."

Love is not a weakness, it is a strength. That is what Jounouchi's eyes say. But Kaiba doesn't understand.

"It's a difficult concept to grasp for someone like you. But that doesn't mean it's impossible." He lightly wraps his hand around the back of the CEO's head and leans up, covering his lips with his own.

No! This wasn't how it was supposed to work! Kaiba's mind screams at him. Jounouchi's ability to love so easily, Kaiba was supposed to use that, utilize it in such a way that would make the boy crumble. But it was backfiring. He had it all wrong.

Love was not Jounouchi's weakness. It was Kaiba's. And such a weakness it was! The CEO had never even recognized it.

But he had been correct about one thing. It had never been a matter of 'if'. It had consisted only of 'when'. But the question was different now.

_When _had Seto Kaiba fallen in love with Jounouchi Katsuya?

As to _why _Jounouchi was kissing him, it hardly mattered. _Why _Kaiba was wrapping his arms around him, _why_ he was pulling him closer to his chest, it didn't matter at all.

And despite this being completely astray from Kaiba's original goals -or was it, really?- Kaiba felt his infatuation being sedated, his needs filled in that one moment.

And to think that he had wanted to get rid of Jounouchi…to think that this had been initiated by Kaiba himself, approaching Jounouchi and proposing a relationship with him, all with the ill intentions of making him fall, then breaking his heart. To think that Kaiba had thought that _that _would be the only way he could use Jounouchi's weakness (though, now, obviously not) in order to destroy him. And to think that this all would come crashing down on Kaiba, because he had had it all wrong in the first place.

Well, it's something to think about, isn't it?

He had just wanted untainted perfection. But how could he ask for such a thing when he was so completely unaware of his own flaws? His world would break.

Perhaps it's funny, really. The lone thought entered Kaiba's mind as he all but consumed the warmth being before him: Perhaps it would be Jounouchi, after all this, who would be picking up shattered pieces.

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A/N: Please tell me you understood that! It's a little...uh...out there. I think I wrote it so that it was understandable...right? Certainly I did...I hope.

Anyway, I wrote this as another of my tiny series of "Kaiba's f-ed up logic" oneshots. Because Kaiba is so cute when he thinks he's right, but really, he's way off. Cute little Kaiba...

Note: Bonkotsu (mediocre) and Make inu (pathetic dog) are both things Kaiba calls Jounouchi-kun.

Please leave a review. I would much appreciate it. I did write this, after all, and you did read it, didn't you? Tell me what you think.


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